Making Real Friends in Your 30s and 40s:Why Scheduling Coffee Dates (Not Networking) Changed Everything for Me
Drop-off, pickup, run that errand, put out that fire, get on the meeting link, order that thing, register for that other thing, pickup, drop-off, make that appointment, call them back, drop-off, pickup, email back…
My season of life looks something like that at all times. Overbooked. Slightly haggard at all times (I laughed out loud typing this as I whispered “girl, get it together” to myself). Perpetually thinking about what else I need to do. With young kids, an entrepreneur husband and building two companies of my own, life feels a little like it’s bursting at the seams with not quite enough hours in the day.
One goal I set for myself a few years ago, was being intentional about scheduling time with my girlfriends. If it doesn’t make it on my schedule, it doesn’t happen. Scheduling coffee dates that don’t double as business or networking, simply catching up with the people who are life giving. Especially as life has only become busier, this is a discipline that is core to staying connected and more gives me bandwidth in other areas of my life. That recharge-face time with friends, is pulling back the slingshot for better outcomes professionally, relationally and emotionally.
I’ve had lengthy seasons of solely being focused on work, or the early days of motherhood where you’re just holding it together … Those periods it was head down, tunnel vision without prioritizing friendships.
Women in their 30s and 40s often find themselves in a season where the friend landscape looks a little sparse. The ebbs and flows of life can cause friendships can fade; kids grow up, careers intensify, moves happen or life simply pulls people in different directions. The result? A quiet but real sense of isolation creeps in, even when days feel packed.
When I moved to Cincinnati, newly married with zero connection to the Queen City, I was looking for ways to rebuild connection, craving meaningful sisterhood without the pressure of forced small talk or superficial hangouts. Instead of getting out there and making an effort, I simply went without.
That’s why we are so passionate about inviting people into meaningful community. That’s the place where you can be seen and known.
At HQ in Cincinnati (and growing chapters elsewhere), skate sessions aren't just about solely cruising on a board. Mindset shifts naturally happen, overcoming self-doubt and chasing a little stoke away from your day-to-day in whatever form that takes.
Testimonials from the community highlight this perfectly:
One woman moved to Cincinnati struggling with anxiety and connecting with other women. She never planned to skate much, but the group helped her navigate a tough life transition: "Even if you never touch a board, the community fuels you with confidence."
Another watched meetups for two years, too scared to join. When she finally did, the culture shifted her from "I can’t do that" to "I just did"...and it spilled into other areas of confidence.
A young mom brought her daughter but came prepared to just watch; the encouragement got her involved, turning it into a shared hobby for their relationship.
Even non-skaters find it transformative. Sisterhood pushes personal growth, helps set boundaries around stress and builds a supportive "girlgang" for life's big and small moments.
Our February schedule is kicking off some non-skating events. An opportunity to see some familiar faces and add a few new ones. Life is hard. It’s made easier rooted in a community. I hope you’ll try ours out. No Networking required.
